School for School Counselors Podcast

The Secret to Sustaining Your Passion for School Counseling

• School for School Counselors • Episode 104

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What can keep your motivation and drive burning bright all through the school year? Join us as we uncover how integrating gratitude into your daily practice can reduce stress, boost emotional resilience, and foster a collaborative, positive atmosphere on campus. As we transition into the new academic year, we'll share insights on how gratitude can be your secret weapon to maintaining positivity during challenging times.


Mentioned in This Episode:
BEST YEAR EVER!!!
Modern School Counselor Planner
School for School Counselors Mastermind


Resources:
Bono, G., Emmons, R. A., & McCullough, M. E. (2004). Gratitude in practice and the practice of gratitude. Positive Psychology in Practice, 464-481.

Chan, D. W. (2010). Gratitude, gratitude intervention and subjective well-being among Chinese school teachers in Hong Kong. Educational Psychology, 30(2), 139-153.

Emmons, R. A., & McCullough, M. E. (2003). Counting blessings versus burdens: An experimental investigation of gratitude and subjective well-being in daily life. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(2), 377-389.

Wood, A. M., Froh, J. J., & Geraghty, A. W. (2010). Gratitude and well-being: A review and theoretical integration. Clinical Psychology Review, 30(7), 890-905.


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Speaker 1:

Hey there, school counselor, welcome back to the School for School Counselors podcast. So glad you're back here with me for another episode. There are so many awesomely amazing things happening right now in the world of school counseling and I can't wait to share those with you. And I'll tell you at this time of the year. We're just coming back from the July 4th long weekend, if you're here with me.

Speaker 1:

In the United States, our thoughts and our preparations are beginning to turn toward the beginning of the new school year. We have lots to consider as we think about how we're going to conduct our business, how we want our programs to look and maybe some things that we want to change. So we're going to be talking about those in the next few episodes to help you plan and prepare for your very best year ever. And you know it's funny, it's easy right now to feel very optimistic about our work. It's easy to really look on the bright side of the things that we do and have some eager anticipation for what's to come in the new school year, and I think it's wonderful. I think we need that positivity. We need a little bit of that anxious anticipation to not only drive us toward our most productive and effective school counseling year that we can have, but also to get us ready, to get our hearts and minds ready to really dive into our program's feet first and strive to make impacts for not only our students and their families but also the folks that we work with each and every day. So we're going to be talking about one tremendous way you're going to be able to sustain that motivation and that drive and that excitement and eagerness for building your program throughout the entirety of your school year. You know I'm so glad you're here. This is the School for School Counselors podcast and I'm Steph Johnson, a full-time school counselor, just like you, on a mission to help school counselors create programs that are impactful but also feel sustainable. I want you to love going to work every day and that is my mission here with this podcast and with my School for School Counselors Mastermind, and I'm so glad that you've joined me for this ride.

Speaker 1:

You know, as I said earlier, it's easy to feel excited and motivated toward our work, or at least most of the aspects of it, when things are going well or when things are feeling new. But what about when they're not? What about the days where things don't feel like they're going well. What about the middle of the year, when things are starting to feel really old and tiresome? Sometimes it feels like Groundhog Day, doesn't it? The same things over and over again, the same calls, the same kids. I get it. I live in that world too.

Speaker 1:

What do we do then? How do we cultivate joy in our jobs? How do we stave off bitterness, resentment or just straight up exhaustion? Well, the answer won't surprise you, and you may. When you hear it sort of groan internally a little bit, you might roll your eyes, but we know that this is true. We know that this is one of the single most powerful things that you can cultivate to help have your best school year ever. Not only do we know it anecdotally from the thousands of school counselors that we've mentored and supported throughout the years, but we also know this from peer-reviewed research, and we're gonna give you some resources in the show notes If you're interested in looking up that kind of thing. We're gonna be able to back up this argument. But for now, I want to lay at your feet one of the single most impactful qualities.

Speaker 1:

I think a school counselor needs to feel successful, productive and fulfilled, and, my friend, that's gratitude. My friend, that's gratitude. We know from the literature that gratitude can help reduce stress. We know that gratitude helps to boost our own emotional resilience, and nothing for nothing. We need that right. We hear the worst of the worst that our campuses have to offer. We hear the stories that no one typically shares out loud and we're left to process those and handle those on our own, without sharing with others, and that can be a tremendous burden. We need that emotional resilience to help carry us through. Gratitude also boosts our motivation and our engagement in our work. That creates sustainability, and sustainability means that we're going to be able to remain in this field for the long haul. And let's be real, students do not need a new school counselor on their campus every two to three years. It's not good for them, it's not good for the staff and it's not good for the community. So the more sustainability that we can develop within our field is only going to serve everyone involved the school counselor, the campus, the students and the community.

Speaker 1:

I think, too, that, on a school counseling note, gratitude helps build bridges, and it does this in a few ways. Number one if you are able to be somewhat demonstrative with your gratitude, meaning you're not afraid to tell people how grateful you are for them or how much you love being at your school, maybe sometimes even on days when the rest of your people aren't quite feeling it. If you can openly appreciate others or openly appreciate your collective circumstances, it reduces tension and it also fosters collaboration. We want to have that trust and that mutual respect flowing back and forth on campus. No one wants to be around a bitter school counselor, one who feels overworked and underappreciated and makes it very clear that they don't want to be there each day and y'all. That sounds terrible, but that's an easy mindset to slip into, especially when we take into the consideration some of the campuses that either you or some of our other colleagues are working on. The environments aren't great. The structure and setup of the school counseling program is far less than ideal and it's easy to slip into that state of mind where you become very bitter and resentful.

Speaker 1:

In the same line of thought, we also don't want to become that militant school counselor. Have you ever met one of those, the person who just stands around and barks all day about what they should be doing, what they are doing versus what they need to be doing, how they don't have enough time how they don't have enough support, blah, blah, blah, blah blah. And while I get it is our job to advocate for our roles on campus, we have to be very careful about how we go about our advocacy, and I think that's one thing that has been gotten very wrong in our field. We can't just stand on the corner and start shouting about what we need. That's not going to compel anybody to want to walk over and help us. But, getting back to the point, we don't want to be that militant person who is just constantly complaining or ordering or issuing mandates about what should be happening. We need to be able to find a kernel of gratitude for what we are doing currently on our campuses and, you know, cultivating this gratitude and building these bridges with our staff so that they understand how much we appreciate them, even in less than ideal circumstances, so that we're reducing tension, we're encouraging collaboration and that we're building this trust and mutual respect, instead of barking or complaining all the time. That could take a minute To build the kinds of relationships and trust through gratitude that we want to build. It's not instantaneous, for sure, but I think we can all agree it is definitely worth a good try. Everyone stands to benefit from this approach. There are absolutely no drawbacks.

Speaker 1:

Practicing gratitude in school counseling also shows that we practice what we preach. It drives home the message that we are the real deal. We are modeling for our students and our staff through our own demeanor and our own choices and words. And that's kind of a heavy responsibility when you really stop and think about it. Beyond all of the other pressures of school counseling, we're sometimes expected to conduct our business on a higher level than others on our campus and that's a huge weight on our shoulders. However, if we can do this and do it well, we are going to encourage others on our campus to emulate the way that we are doing business and then they build empathy, they build emotional intelligence and they build resilience.

Speaker 1:

Practicing gratitude as a school counselor also encourages our own professional growth. In the practicing of true gratitude, we're going to have to really embark in some deep self-reflection. We've got to pause for a moment to really consider all aspects of our work. Now we could take it on a surface level and again that's probably going to lead us back toward the path of feeling frustrated or resentful or slightly complaining about our circumstances. But if we really pause for a moment, if we really sift through and dig deep, if we can really find those kernels of gratitude in our circumstances and throughout our day, it's going to naturally encourage self-reflection and, as we reflect on our roles, the way that we're serving students on our campus and perhaps ways that we could get better, it's going to drive our professional growth. It's inevitable we could get better. It's going to drive our professional growth. It's inevitable. So there are tons of benefits for practicing gratitude as a school counselor Stress reduction, emotional resilience, sustainability in the field, building bridges and trust with others on campus, practicing what we preach and encouraging our own professional growth and this is just a sampling, really, of the multitude of benefits that you can realize through a true gratitude practice.

Speaker 1:

The thing is, though, gratitude can't be one of those things that you just you know happen to try when you think about it, when the day's kind of slow and you're just sort of sitting and reflecting and oh you know, maybe I should think about some things I'm grateful for. That's not a gratitude practice. A gratitude practice requires intentionality. It requires elements put into place that ensure that you do not forget, because part of cultivating true gratitude is being able to do so consistently from day to day and sometimes reflecting on the changes as you go through your gratitude journey. So I think there are a few ways that you could look toward in incorporating gratitude into your school counseling day and again, this list isn't completely comprehensive. You'll probably think of more as you hear me talk through these ideas, but the point is to get your mind going in that direction, so that, as you hear me talk through these ideas, but the point is to get your mind going in that direction, so that as you're planning for the new school year, as you're scheming and dreaming for the things that you want to do to best serve students, you'll be able to incorporate some of these mechanisms for gratitude into your plans. I think it's going to be amazing and I can't wait to hear what you decide on.

Speaker 1:

So first, campus walks Just walking your campus periodically, looking for what's awesome instead of what's not, really being mindful in that journey. Taking walks and really looking for what you love, what you're grateful for, what lights your heart up as you work through your day, and then intentionally communicating those points of gratitude to your students, your staff and even your community. What about, for example, some newsletter sections, perhaps entire newsletters, or social media posts related to themes. I'm grateful for this on our campus. I'm grateful for our team. I'm grateful for our students' success stories. I'm grateful for our family vibe on our campus, whatever it is. What about choosing a different theme periodically and communicating information related to gratitude to everyone who wants to read or listen? That could be a tremendous step toward not only enhancing your own gratitude practice, but encouraging it in others as well.

Speaker 1:

How about a gratitude board, or what some people call a smile file? The things that just light your heart up, the notes or the well wishes, or the little scribble pictures that just make you smile every time you see them. Keep them visible. That's only going to encourage you to reflect on those and remember that we can find something to be grateful for in every single workday. Another idea how about intentionally sitting down to send emails or handwritten notes to staff members?

Speaker 1:

Now, traditionally, we see this done by administrators on campuses. If they're really good, they're going to set aside time to connect with everyone on their campus and relay some you know some awesomeness that they're seeing or some well wishes. But there's no rule saying that you can't do that too, so a random note from out of the blue can mean so much to someone, especially if they're having a hard day, and it literally takes maybe 30 seconds of your time. Y'all this doesn't need to be fancy. This could be something scribbled on a cute notepad sheet or even a post-it note. The point is really just expressing how you feel about that person, that you're glad that they're there, that they make a difference for the students on your campus. I mean, who doesn't want to hear that? And as you're composing and delivering these messages, it's only going to serve to cement your own gratitude practice. There are some things that you can do to remind yourself and really double down on the idea of a consistent gratitude practice throughout your school year.

Speaker 1:

Now we talk a lot about this in our School for School Counselors Mastermind. We run what we call our Data Discussions Cohort, which is a group of folks who are really invested in working with, capturing and utilizing school counseling data, and we meet monthly to talk about what's going right, what's not going so well, how can we fix it and how can we set up systems that practically ensure our success. That is a powerful group, and one of the things that we talk about in setting up our systems for data collection is the idea of creating cues in our environment. Now, this is not our idea. We work a lot with James Clear's Atomic Habits and as we've worked with that text and really kind of reflected on and digested the points in building sustainable habits, one of the things that stuck out like a sore thumb was our lack of cues. So we talk a lot about how to set our environment up to remind us to do these things until it becomes habit.

Speaker 1:

Here are some ideas for setting up some cues in your school counseling office to remind you about gratitude. Number one just making it a part of your routine. If you're the kind of counselor who sits down and outlines a daily schedule or a daily task list or to-do list, or even if you time block your day, those are going to be great opportunities to remind yourself to devote just five minutes to a gratitude practice sometime within your day. You can also incorporate them as part of a transition ritual and we talked about transition rituals at length in episode 54 last summer in July where we have a ritual that signals to our brains that the workday is done and personal time is beginning. It is a powerful practice to really help you set and keep some great boundaries between school and home. So if you're not familiar with the idea of a transition ritual, I'm going to encourage you go back and find episode 54 and listen to that one and it will get you all lined out.

Speaker 1:

But for the purpose of the conversation today, think about incorporating a gratitude practice within your transition ritual. So, personally, I have a transition ritual. At the end of each day, I take off my name tag that I have clipped to my shoulder, I clip my set of master keys to my name tag, I take one deep breath and I think about one thing I'm grateful for at the end of the workday. That's my transition ritual. It's not fancy, it's not elaborate and it probably takes between 20 and 30 seconds, but for me it is so super powerful because I'm signaling to my brain let go of the workday, my personal time is beginning and we will be able to pick all this up tomorrow.

Speaker 1:

And last, as a last idea, this is something that was suggested to me by a colleague in our podcast, episode 87. The amazing Jessica Neidt, who I have the pleasure of working with within my school district, practices three good things. At the end of each day, she sits down and conscientiously reflects on three good things that happened in that day, and sometimes they're big, giant, mind-blowing moments, and sometimes they're very small and might even seem insignificant at first thought. But through intentionally cultivating this practice of three good things, jessica not only is more invested in her work than ever, but she's been able to push through some really big challenges on her campus with grace, with dignity and with the renewed desire to serve her students. She's an amazing role model for all of us. If you haven't listened to that episode, go catch it episode 87.

Speaker 1:

But consider incorporating gratitude into the end of your day as three good things. As luck would have it, we have our free Modern School Counselor Planner available right now, and there is a spot at the bottom of each day that is purely available for anything you want it to be, and a lot of the school counselors that we've talked to are using that space to record moments of gratitude for their day. And I got to tell you I'm going to try to start practicing that this year for myself as well. I think not only is it going to be very powerful in strengthening my gratitude game, but it's also going to be super fun to flip back in that planner and reflect on some of the things that I picked up on earlier in the school year to see how things changed over time and to see, maybe, how my perspective changed as well. So I encourage you, find some ways to incorporate cues and habits into your gratitude practice so that you never forget to stop and think about what really makes your world shine as a school counselor. All right, so I hope that that kind of gets your mind going about some things that you can do. Remember that if you want to incorporate these aspects into your program, you don't need to do everything I mentioned. Right, you can start small. Choose one thing to incorporate in your day, or one practice or mindset. Perhaps it's a mantra Whatever gets you through your gratitude game, choose one aspect and then commit to implementing it fully throughout your school year and I think you're going to be pleasantly surprised at the results.

Speaker 1:

Hey, last week we did something really cool in the School for School Counselors world. We opened up registration for our annual Best Year Ever event. And y'all, I cannot tell you how excited I am for this year's Best Year Ever, not only because I know it is the single most impactful event that we host all year long, but also because we have lots of new material, new ideas and new sources of inspiration for you as you begin the new school year. It's going to be fantastic and the best part is it is 1000% free to you. All you have to do is give us your email address so we can send you the link and where to join us each day, july 23rd through the 26th, but also y'all this is a no pitch event. That means it's not a bunch of workshops where people try to pitch you their curriculums or their resources. At the end it's not like that. This is straight-up school counseling information. It's going to be great reminders for those of you that have been in practice for a minute, and it's going to be some wonderful insight for those of you that are getting your school counseling program started within the first three years. We also have some phenomenal new material. When you see this, it is going to totally blow your mind and give you a completely new perspective on your work. Now that sounds like a big promise, but I'm here to tell you we are ready to deliver. So if you want to see what it's all about, head over to our website, schoolforschoolcounselorscom. Slash bestyearever, get all signed up and y'all will take it from there. We'll make sure we get you all the info, all the links to join us July 23rd through the 26th, each evening at 8 pm Eastern.

Speaker 1:

All right, so before I go, just to recap gratitude in your school counseling program is more than a buzzword. It's more than just a trendy movement or something that sounds cool, right. It is really important to sustain those days that aren't so great, to keep you moving forward when it feels like everybody is trying to push you backward into the role of a guidance counselor, when we feel bitter or resentful or just plain tired and overwhelmed from the things that we see and hear every day. Remember the benefits of gratitude for not only yourself but as it spreads throughout your campus, and to establish some practices or cues to help keep that gratitude practice going. I hope this helped you get motivated and inspired for the upcoming school year. I, for one, cannot wait for the new year to start and I hope you feel the same. As we leave this episode, don't forget to go sign up for Best Year Ever schoolforschoolcounselorscom. Slash bestyearever, and I will be back soon with another podcast episode just for you. So keep listening, but until then, I hope you have the best week. Take care.